I fucking hate Greenhouse open mic. And I hate how my band and fellow musician friends always drag me to play a tune there with them. I despise that place and everyone who walks through the door. It’s so fucking cliquey and full of rude arrogant people. Not a single soul there has ever showed me a shred of compassion. I feel sick to my stomach just thinking about that place and I hate how aggressive everyone gets every time I express I don’t want to go. They literally have ruined open mics for me and I refuse to go back there let alone even step inside another open mic night again.
I like drinking coffee alone, and reading alone.
I like riding the bus alone, and walking home alone.
It gives me time to think, and set my mind free.
I like eating alone, and listening to music alone.
But when I see a mother with her child;
A girl with her lover;
Or a friend laughing with their best friend;
I realize that even though I like being alone
I don’t fancy being lonely.
I’ve been high off of percocets since Tuesday and I never thought I’d say this but I can’t wait to be fucking sober and not in pain and can walk and shower and sit at the table and piano and fucking do normal things and be a fucking human being.